Singing Vegetable Pirates...

Well, I've never been to Greenland
(But I have flown over it on my way to Europe a few times...it's BIG and not all that green.)
and I've never been to Denver
(Actually, I have been to Denver. I lived there from 1964-1971.)
and I've never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul.
(No, not in St. Louis, but maybe St. Paul, since I probably did bury something there while in college at Bethel.)
And I've never been to Moscow
(Oh, but I want to go there some day. I won't likely be going to Starbuck's when I'm there -- I hear the Mocha Latte is $9.)
and I've never been to Tampa
(Again...been there. Going there Saturday for a Cross Country meet, in fact. I wonder if we'll see the ocean. I've not seen the ocean for months.)
and I've never been to Boston in the fall!
(I was there this past summer and I did not fall while there, so I think this remains true.)

'Cuz we're the pirates who don't do anything!
We just stay at home and lie around.
And if you ask us to do anything,
we'll just tell you... we don't do anything!

And I never hoist the mainstay
(I'm not sure what a mainstay is, actually.)
and I never swab the poop deck
(Oh, I think I've done enough babysitting that can say I've swabbing the poop deck...)
and I never veer to starboard 'cuz I never sail at all.
(That's true.)
And I've never walked the gangplank
(But...figuratively. I have walked it figuratively.)
and I've never owned a parrot
(I caught a kind of parrot in my backyard a couple days after one of the hurricanes a few years ago. Eventually found the owners. Does that count? And are you counting all the "qualifier" words in that sentence...good grief!)
and I've never been to Boston in the fall!
(Yeah, I think I already talked about this.)

'Cuz we're the pirates who don't do anything!
We just stay at home and lie around.
And if you ask us to do anything,
we'll just tell you... we don't do anything!

Well, I've never plucked a rooster
(True again.)
and I'm not too good at ping-pong
(I've never been too good at ping-ping unless I was playing against an 8 year old who enjoys the fact that I want us to "hit is as many times as we can" more than I want to win.)
and I've never thrown my mashed postatoes up against a wall!
(Can a person plead the 5th in a blog?)
And I've never kissed a chipmunk
(I kissed a pig when I was teaching as a homecoming stunt. I'd do it again.)
and I've never gotten head lice
(But I have treated head lice a few time. There are worse things in life.)
and I've never been to Boston in the fall!
(This is getting redundant.)